Friday, February 19, 2010

Article #90 Dating at BYU

Dating at BYU in the 1960s was fun, and it was wonderful to have such a large selection of young LDS fellows to meet at dances and other church activities. We were all organized into student wards. I remember one Sunday having three different dates: one date to go to church with in the morning, a different fellow I invited for dinner with my roommates, and then another fellow for a fireside date that evening. This was tricky, arranging events so they didn’t meet each other.

BYU was like a daters dream come true, once you got into the swing of it. I was a junior in class standing, but nevertheless started dating steadily a young man that was a freshman majoring in music. We had lots of fun together, but after his first year of college, he was ready for his church mission. So, the time came to say farewell for two years or forever. We broke up because he didn’t want me to wait for him. It seemed that each young man I dated helped me understand more about life, and what I was not looking for in a companion.

As a senior at BYU, I met an older graduate student and we started dating. He was 29, a returned missionary and a perpetual student––it should have been a perfect match. Studying to teach Seminary, he couldn’t teach until he was married. He had logically gone about making his list of qualities he wanted in a potential mate. Dating about sixteen young BYU coeds, he checked them out against his list. Then eliminated them one by one, he narrowed his list down to one––me! But in all his mental calculations, he had forgotten the romantic side of a relationship.

Though we enjoyed dating, going to dances, parties and concerts, there were no sparks between us. He wanted to get engaged, but I felt no romantic love for him. We had never even kissed! He had prayed and was sure I was “the one,” but my prayers didn’t come up with the same answer. Still not sure how that happens. He also wanted a large family of ten children or more. He told me he knew this would be a “big challenge as you would need to be pregnant for the next twenty years.” He still isn’t married to this day. I guess he ended up being “the old maid.”