Sabotaging ourselves

Well I was going to post a message on self image and discovered I'd already done that. Then I thought okay how about negative self talk but I'd done that too. So look up the links above for good ideas on those topics in my earlier posts, and I'll try to tackle a new angle.

SABOTAGING is what we do to ourselves when we are trying to improve something we want to change. I've noticed in my community ed. class several negative ideas that keep surfacing. If we focus on ourselves, we are being selfish. We have to serve others and forget ourselves. But the question I have is how can we serve others if our well is dry, and we are filling ourselves with negative self talk?

I've introduced my comm. ed. students to an interesting technique I learned years ago for a workshop called Uprooting Stress I took from Ken and Sharon Patey. At the time I had 3 teenagers, a 2 year old at home and a depressed now former hubby, so I needed to deal with stress. They taught us how to unlayer or change your negative self talk that puts you in stress. One example of this would be the belief-I'm responsible for everyone's happiness. A common belief for women that causes them to overeat, have high blood pressure and not take care of themselves. The process goes like this. First write down all the reasons you believe this concept is true. Well, let's do it:

1. I am the heart of the home

2. Everyone relies on me for everything

3. If I weren't here, the family would fall apart, etc.

You get the idea, when you have exhausted that line of thinking-look at the other side. What says I'm not responsible for everyone's happiness.

1. They need to take responsibility for themselves.

2. I can't make everything all better.

3. I need to value myself, etc.

FINAL STEP-What's the TRUTH REALLY? I can only do so much, others will have to take responsibility for their own happiness. Then apply this new positive self talk in your life. TRY IT-IT WORKS.