Saturday, November 22, 2014

Article #319 Complex Repairs



               In our world today, complex family relationships are common with the number of individuals who divorce or die after marrying or separate after living together without marriage or remarry multiple times. All of this makes for step relationships as well as divided families. When I  divorced 35 years ago, it was awkward to know how to treat my in-laws. Loyalty issues arose. Some family members strained to know how to relate to the divorced partner of their son or daughter. It certainly is a new situation that calls for forgiveness, understanding and time to repair/heal the disappointments involved. The children of divorce are the ones who need the most help in adjusting to the new situation whatever kind of estrangement or change takes place as the ex-spouses move on in their individual paths.


            Grandparents though now the former in-laws (or outlaws as I jokingly called mine) are still family and want to have a place in their grandchildren’s lives. Flexibility on the part of all involved is important in going forth and stabilizing life after any traumatic change. Family reunions and holidays become a tricky situation to navigate. Who gets the kids to celebrate, etc.? Sister and brother in-laws feel awkward relating to the former spouse of their sibling and vice versa. What a mess. Although we’d like to think that adults can be unconditionally acceptant of all involved, it rarely happens and the children of divorce watch and wonder why. The same could be true of those who separate without marriage or divorce, relationships have been developed which are suddenly changed create instability in the lives of any family.

            At one time divorce was looked down upon, now it almost seem common in 50% of our marriages today. Not a good statistic for stability in children’s lives. It is also possible for a sibling to divorce their own family members through some misunderstanding that stops communication and disrupts family interactions. Many children of divorce continue to feel angry at one or both of their parents for the divorce even into their adult years. Talk about lack of family unity. Similar to the hillbilly feuds when kinfolk fought back and forth so much that many forgot what they were fighting over. A return to family solidarity is only possible if all involved are willing to forgive and move on to healing after griefing over the loss of the family. 

Thursday, November 20, 2014

Boat Report

It been a long time between progress reports on the boat, because hubby had to backtrack and remove four layers of outer paint off the boat because it wasn't sticking to the epoxy painted layer. Finally he's solved that and is on his way again after several months of detours and road blockages with a new paint.

Meticulous in his technique, a real masterpiece is created. 
Carefully painted and sanded between each coat takes time.

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Autumn Ride

After Snow Canyon we drove further to see some autumn leaves.
In a land full of sage and cedar, even rabbit bush is glorious.
Taking a break near Gunlock at an old swimming hole.
Looks like a fun place to fish or swim in the hot summertime.
An oasis in the desert landscape
Donkeys graze in the grasslands near Gunlock Reservoir
One of many reservoirs to catch and use limited water in our area.
Autumn leaves and colors made for a glorious enoyable ride.

Sunday, November 16, 2014

Snow Canyon Picnic

Off for a picnic in Snow Canyon-it's 65 degrees today, but a storm is coming.
I love the red rocks of Southern Utah and the variations in colors. 
Just imagine the forces that formed these cliffs over the years...
Found a quiet picnic spot to enjoy our Jimmy John sandwiches.

Soon we had a visitor, my guess is a Rocky Mountain Blue Jay.
Hubby  threw a potato chip at the end of the table and Mr. Jay grabbed it.
The view looking back into the St. George area, only $3 park admission.
Notice the variations in color with different layers of rock.
Even desert cactus is beautiful, but don't touch....

Friday, November 14, 2014

Article #318 Repairing Bridges


           How do we close the gaps in our family relationships? By building a bridge of online communication! With the modern generation so enthralled with digital games, texting and social media, you can reach out and connect with them using the Internet. Time for an old dog to learn new tricks––IF you want to strengthen your links with family members. Grandkids appreciate grandparents who connect with them via e-mail, text or instant messaging. Youth love to show the older generation how to use the Internet.
            Let’s face it, the day of receiving a nicely composed handwritten note from a younger loved one are over. Even birthday cards are a dying art as you can more easily send and receive an e-card online, unless you don’t have a computer or smart phone. Yes, it does take some effort to learn the basics of new technology. It’s easier to say I’m too old to learn that. If that’s your reasoning, please consider that perhaps YOU are missing an opportunity to do some needed bonding with family members that will strengthen or repair bridges between you.
            In these days of our extended family living in distant locations rather than the same hometown, it’s necessary to reach out somehow. I remember twenty years ago trying to start a family round robin letter that would circulate among my new step daughters after my marriage to their dad. Each family was to update their activities and send it on to the next sister then return all the news to us. Well that got as far as the first daughter where it died for lack of time. Fast forward to modern times, with the Internet it’s possible to instantly announce family news via Facebook, and send photos. Now it’s possible to be connected all day.
            A friend of mine was still using a typewriter to compose poems and send letters. Then I convinced her at age 79 to get a used computer. After a few lessons from me and support from her family, she’s able to compose messages and communicate with her extended family around the world via e-mail. Challenge yourself to consider adding or expanding the use of technology to help you strengthen or repair bridges in your family. Asking for help can be a good start at bridging the age gap in generations. Just showing an interest in others to learn or ask for help, says volumes to those we reach out to. NEXT TIME: Complex Repairs. 

Thursday, November 13, 2014

Fall FAIR

Trying again to sell my books at the annual Fall Fair in Sunriver.

Note the frozen palm tree in the background that didn't make it through winter.
My best book sales are on amazon.com though I've tried selling on my blog too.
Lots of fun booths to visit but I bought nothing this year.
Christmas is coming too soon. 
Love all the creativity in these items for sale.
I'm out of space for decorating my home but these are tempting...
Doesn't everyone want a decorated long horn?
More items with an African flavor. 
Homemade jewelry looks awesome. 
A photographer friend who is a real professional. 
Taken from his kitchen wall he says.
Lots of fun arrangements but my house is full every shelf and corner!

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Lattices and Privacy

Since so many plants suffered winter kill last Dec, our neighbors back yard has been more visible as their growing plants were cut back. That lead us to decide to put a trellis between us for our new trumpet vines to grown on. Here's a before and after. Cheaper than building a wall.

View out our dining room window into our neighbor's backyard
Privacy fence before staining, note three little trumpet vines-grow!
With redwood stain-it's almost too much but wintering and vines will cover it.