Thursday, September 26, 2013

Article #262 Single, Never Married


            With all the divorce in our society, it’s no wonder than many youth from broken homes grow up and don’t  marry. With few examples of happy marriages in their immediate or extended family to guide them, some may not want to wed. Or they could be socially inept in relationships––lacking the self esteem to make this major commitment. During high school days, there tends to be a coupling of individuals for dates, dances and social activities. If you aren’t part of this IN CROWD, it can lead to a lack of self confidence and lost opportunities to find a spouse. I didn’t date till college and remember feeling left out in high school. When I finally got engaged at age 23, I was definitely an OLD MAID. Now as I look back, I wish I hadn’t spend so much time obsessing about getting married or having a steady boy friend, but instead ENJOYED that time to develop my talents and interests.
            Some individuals who don’t marry for whatever reason, choose to live alone or with their parents or friends and miss the joys and challenges of having their own family and children. Nowadays it’s a little easier to meet someone with digital dating to help you find a compatible mate. But don’t trust a computer with this important part of your life and relationship expectations. Push yourself to socialize, meet others, get involved with service projects, etc. Learn to send value to those of the opposite sex without compromising your standards or goals in life. Life’s not a race, it’s a "self improvement" journey.
            Single never marrieds can hopefully find a FULFILLING CAREER to meet their needs and supportive friends to socialize with to fill the lonely hours. Still there may be a feeling of failure in their inner thoughts and heart and a longing to be normal, to have a family and enjoy the companionship and love of a committed partner. Always feeling different and left out in a world of couples and families, it's still possible to live a full life by looking outside one’s self for opportunities to SERVE and LIFT OTHERS. Developing your talents and interests can bring happiness. There are advantages to being single in terms of personal freedom and resources, unless you spent all your time focused on pursuing marriage. Remember-we will all be single at some point in our life whether never married, divorced or widowed. NEXT TIME: Do Something Physical. 

2 comments:

Brenda @ Its A Beautiful Life said...

Lin, a thoughtful post on this topic.

I first married at age 4O... now that was an old maid. LOL. And I remember deciding that I would create a life of joy being single. I grew and matured and became the woman that a man would enjoy being married to.

I hope many will be blessed by this piece.

Kay said...

Sigh... My husband and I have a happy marriage, but my son and his partner refuse to get married. They just don't believe in it. Why? Sigh...