Labor weekend away...

I'm off to Salt Lake City to visit with family…

It's a small prop plane but will get me there in one hour...

Delta Airlines at Salt Lake City airport...

Lunch with son Daniel and dg-in-law Tina

Life on the FAST TRACK?

Where has August gone to?

Just yesterday summer began

with 100+ degrees...steaming hot,

now there's coolness in the air.

Welcome fall is not far away, then

it's winter again...freezing cold. 

Sometimes I feel like part

of a huge soap opera starring ME.

But I have no script control

just along for the ride...crazy!

When younger my dreams

of today were much different.

Continual bliss, not daily trials,

challenges and obstacles to overcome.

Someone else had different plans

for me. Life is a struggle to the end.

Everyday's a new lesson to learn.

My patience wears thin somedays,

but I continue with determination towards

the final destination at some unknown time.

Lessons to LEARN

RACE to PERFECTION

by Lin Floyd

Running uphill at great speed,

he’d finish first despite others’ efforts.

It didn’t matter how he got to the goal,

just get there before anyone else.

Then at the end of the race called life,

he discovers...it's a lonely place.

Trophies and ribbons count for not

when you are the only winner––alone.

Too late to celebrate an empty victory

as strewn runners passed by along

the way were ignored by the leader.

Better to run as a team, then all will win.

Article #306 EXPECTATIONS

            It seems in our modern society that the traditional old-fashioned family and its values are fading away. Yet many young people, growing up in today’s families full of broken relationships caused by death, divorce or other disruptions, are still choosing a partner to create their own expectations of a FAMILY. Where are their role examples, if not in their own family? Television and movies certainly don’t portray emotionally healthy lifestyles. In our current reality TV shows everyone seems to be focused on their own selfish desires, not willing to accept responsibility for anyone else’s happiness. Commitment and fidelity seem to be lost in the rush for self-fulfillment. I can’t tell you how many romance movies or novels where boy meets girl, feels love (or lust) and in a manner of hours/days they are in bed together without any commitment for their future. How many young people feel that this is normal and expected in our society?

           Are families needed? Many modern thinkers will tell you a resounding NO! But there is something to be said for the security of  the old-fashioned family where values are taught and modeled by loving committed parents. Our genealogies are full of family examples that need to be shared and preserved, held up as a model to emulate. I knew my grandfather loved my grandmother. He was totally committed to her care and his family. His free time was spent growing a garden to help with the food bill and sharing his love of the great outdoors with family on fishing and camping trips. He was a man of integrity. Though not a churchgoer, Grandpa was the first there to help a neighbor in need. I loved writing about his life story to share with my family. Our youth need to know of their roots and the sacrifices of others family members that opened up opportunities for their descendants.     

            Every family has its disappointments and trials, individuals who stray from common principles, and lessons to be learned. But a family is always there to hopefully love and forgive one another in this great school called LIFE. Although my mother and I didn’t see eye to eye on many issues, I knew she had my back. She was there for me. Friends have come and gone over the years, but family is always there. Are there stories about your family that you need to write to share their examples? NEXT TIME: Saturday Night Drive Inn. 

INDEXING...

I've been participating in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints' INDEXING program for many years. Since last January, I've been involved with Italian Indexing. The purpose of this activity is to identify names on digital copies available from the world's VITAL RECORDS for people to use in their family history research. It's quite the project and uses volunteers from all faiths and countries. Want to help with this amazing project? Click here.

We are in the GOLDEN AGE of genealogy. I started back in the DARK AGES before copy machines and computers where you had to go to a card catalog in a library, select your book or microfilm number then search the book or microfilm (which required using a microfilm reader in a darken room to find your ancestor's name.)  Now all that can be done at HOME at any hour on your personal computer in a manner of minutes but only because of the efforts of the Mormon Church and others to digitize these vital records around the world, then publish them on www.familysearch.org for anyone to use. There are currently family history missionaries from our church in 20 different countries preserving and extracting important records for genealogists. During 2014 over 1 BILLION records have been indexed by 248,160 volunteers of all ages. You can help too.

Happy 50th Un-Anniversary!

I found a POEM that describes life. Thanks to my friend Carolyn. She used it as a family therapist to help others heal from major trauma in their lives. It seems to fit my mood for this 50th un-anniversary of my first marriage in 1964 that ended in divorce in 1975. Oh, the lessons I have learned and the many poems/books that came from this experience. Life is never easy for anyone, but sometimes we victimize ourselves long after an event happens...by revisiting and dwelling on its effect on our life. Time to complete the healing! Celebrate my LIFE now!

Autobiography in Five Short Chapters By Portia Nelson

I

I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk
I fall in.
I am lost ... I am helpless.
It isn't my fault.
It takes me forever to find a way out.

II

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I am in the same place
but, it isn't my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

III

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in ... it's a habit.
my eyes are open
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

IV

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

V

I walk down another street.

Article #305 Friends and Family

         Thank goodness for friends that come into our life and become like family to us. In my growing up years as an only child, I turned to cousins and friends of all ages for support, encouragement and listening ears. With my mom as a widow, I needed male role models in my life. My grandfather stepped in and gave me the hugs, attention and time needed until we moved away. Then, a special grandmother became my friend, babysitter and role model while my mom worked.

Close friends can be like family. As I look back, I remember playing with a gang of little kids in my pre-elementary school years. It didn’t matter their age or gender. We were buddies. gathered together for fun and adventure. When I moved to my maternal grandmother’s home with my mom after my dad’s death, I had two male cousins that were like brothers to me. We played together, and walked to grade school together. I even shared a classroom with my cousin Bill who was my same age. Our mothers were sisters, and our grandma was babysitter to us all. Other female cousins became my life-long friends.

            Do you talk to your grandchildren or nieces and nephews about your childhood friends? Everyone could use a family member or friend who cares.  Being free from the day to day pressures of child raising could free up those of us in our golden years to share with our posterity or extended family members values needed for personal survival and fulfillment. Young ones cherish time spent with loving family members that show an interest in their lives. I can still remember with fondness talking with my grandparents and sharing my experiences with them. 

Nowadays, connecting and listening can be done via emails, phone calls or even texting or skyping if you live a distance from those you care about. Parents in your family can use some one on one time if only a word of encouragement in their many responsibilities. Though, eye to eye contact and hugs are necessary for all of us to survive in our digital society. Telling your descendents what life was like when you were young can help give them a perspective on their lives that could be lacking. Writing down and sharing your experiences will preserve your efforts with life for generations. NEXT TIME: Expectations.  Read more of Lin's childhood experiences in her first book published LOOKING BACK AT THE GOOD OLD DAYS, available here for $10.
  

Pine Valley again

Pine Valley Chapel constructed in 1868, still in use!

Padded wooden bleachers are still in use.

Lovely chapel with a stage area for performances also.

Handmade wooded podium says it all.

Amazing what pioneer could build with few tools but lots of labor. 

Intricate wood structure for the roof of the chapel, constructed like a boat.

Lots of individuals have attended this church/school and social hall.

Watch out wild turkey crossings!

Goodbye to Pine Valley mountains and a wonderful church picnic.

Sunsets on another busy desert mountain day...

Selfie REFLECTIONS

CONSTANCY 

by Lin Floyd

Proven as spring follows winter,

planted seeds don’t  always grow.

Hopes are not promises.

Expectations are only possibilities.

Trust in whatever comes,

gratitude for mistakes, stumbles

and falls makes the difference

in happiness now or misery.

Looking back at problems

can bring lessons of wisdom,

opportunities to understand

the purpose of each day’s journey.

Captured...

REMEMBER THE HAWK?

Waiting paid off, perched up high 

finally an unknowing prey appears. 

Soon the hawk has his daily meal 

as life ends suddenly for the victim.

Article #304 Family As Priority

Life today for parents can be a rat race between work, school, church, and community activities. Individuals can loose track of the importance of the family and the opportunities that parenting provides. Many young people are choosing not to marry or have children because of the responsibilities involved. That’s where grandparents or aunts and uncles can be helpful if they live close enough to support family values that could be lost in our modern society. Some grandparents do fill their retirement days with a new rat race running from activities to appointments mostly medical. It’s too easy no matter your age or responsibilities to put family as a low priority.

It would be an ideal world if every family was loving and supportive. Unfortunately that doesn’t always happen as death, divorce, abuse and other factors play a role in how nurturing your childhood and growing up was. As an only child raised by a widowed mom (she was raised by a widowed mom also), my goal was always to have an intact HAPPY family with lots of kids and a loving father in the home, but unfortunately that got derailed when divorce introduced itself to my dreams after my marriage.

Recently a friend of mine shared with me that her childhood lacked loving, caring parents.  School teachers encouraged and praised her abilities, an aunt loved her unconditionally and a family friend created many happy memories from the times they spent together. When this special family friend died, Donna wrote a memorial poem about him as one way to handle the grief she felt.  Here’s that poem: 

A FRIEND THEN, A FRIEND STILL by Donna

It was 1950 when they met, 

a man twenty three, her a child yet. 

This guy who might have been partying, having fun

chose to befriend a child quite young.

She needed someone who would listen and praise, 

he took the time to brighten her days. 

Many moves later, he never lost touch 

with this young person who missed him so much. 

He settled down, married and had his own child 

but always wrote notes that filled her with smiles. 

When she thinks of Gary, she thinks of him thus 

a man you could count on, a man you could trust. 

A man who was loving even across miles 

always remembered by Donna, his pal. 

When the year 2002, began 

his beautiful life came to an end. 

But her heart and soul will always contain 

sweet memories of Gary, her forever friend. 

NEXT TIME: Friends and Family. Would love to add your short stories here-leave them in a comment.

            

Victim or Enemy?

Two years ago I wrote a post about EXPECTATIONS and ASSUMPTIONS and I'm still learning about this topic-how to integrate it into my life. Lately, a book was recommended to me Bonds that Make Us Free: Healing Our Relationships, Coming to Ourselves by C. Terry Warner that is very helpful on this same topic but expands it to include SELF-VICTIMIZATION which goes along with my developing thoughts about INNER VOICES. As the POGO historical cartoon above says...We (I) have met the enemy and he is us (me)!

When we are focused on REACTING instead of ACTING, we become a victim. We are CHOOSING to be victimized. Just because you think you are attacked verbally or emotionally, doesn't mean you have to take it personally and continue the attack on you with your own inner voices or attack back. (Inner voices can help you stop the downward progression of your self esteem.) Some kind of STOP BUTTON needs to take place to activate a NEW KIND of thinking other than taking everything PERSONALLY. Although there maybe times when criticisms may be TRUE and can be used to actually improve yourself.

I'm thinking when I hear or feel a negative remark about myself, the process could look like this:

1. Is that really true about me?

2. If so, what do I need to change?

3. If not, how can I ACT instead of REACT and send value to my criticizer and rebuild our relationship or perhaps I need to protect myself from this person.

4. If my inner voices, repeat this criticism and I begin to buy into being a VICTIM, I need to remind myself that it's my CHOICE-not a given reaction.

RESPOND: Please ask questions in a comment and let's carry on this conversation. One question I'm asking me is Am I choosing to make myself a VICTIM? Most of the time, I am. In those cases where I am NOT, perhaps it's time to practice FORGIVENESS towards the person who seems to be offending me.

Hawk Waiting

HAWK WAITING

In the tree outside my kitchen window

sits a quiet Kestrel hawk unnoticed,

alert ––observant––focused.

Patiently he sits on a high branch

waits for his next meal of birds

that land on our backyard fence.

It won’t be long till he selects his prey,

swoops down, closes his claws securely

about an unsuspecting carefree victim.

Then with savageness, he’ll de-feather,

devour greedily his meal for the day,

returning to his perch to wait for more.

Hawks like critics always look for

weaknesses in others to pounce upon,

rip away self confidence and esteem.

Beware––don’t be a victim, watch out.

Who protects you from your critics?

Pine Valley Mountains

Our church is having a PICNIC in the PineValley Mountains 40 miles away later this month. So, hubby and I drove up last Saturday to check out the facility. Here's what we found:

A doe and her two little fawns meandering nearby on a morning stroll!

Animals enjoying wonderful cool pastures in the Pine Valley Mountains. 

Anyone know what the unusual two toned cows are called?

Ah, coolness and beauty is found in a mountain stream!

Lots of places so inviting to take time to go walking in nature...

Our group picnic area for 75 people-we'll have hamburgers and more!

Article # 303 Keep It Simple

           Start writing about something that interests you about your life. Challenge yourself to recall your most memorial experience with a parent or grandparent. What made it special? Perhaps it was a simple picnic in the mountains or the first time you went fishing. Events that were special because of the relationships you had with those involved. Writing down these early memories will stir up other remembrances from the past. Old photos or scrapbooks can be good memory joggers or old letters or postcards. Best of all is talking face to face with parents or grandparents if they are still around and asking questions. Soon you will be sharing your family’s past.

Christine Provstgaard of St. George tells us how finding some old family letters led her to discoveries about her grandparents. In my brother's attic, a box was found containing old letters our mother had saved. These were letters from my grandfather to my grandmother written in 1931. When my grandfather was away on business trips he would travel by train and wrote letters home every day. On March 23, 1931 he was on the Portland Rose going to Seattle, Washington for a banking convention. The train was called "a triumph in train comfort." A small pamphlet reveals some of the train's amenities: Observation-Club Car: barber, valet, maid service, writing desks, periodicals, newspapers, radio, market reports, lounges and sun rooms, hair cuts for men, bobs for women 50¢, shave 25¢, hair singe 25¢, and facial massage $1.00. Baths, manicures and hair dressing were arranged by maid service. Valet from 6:30 a.m. to midnight provided a clothes-pressing service.

My mother was from the second family. Grandpa's first wife had died in childbirth, leaving him with four children. He was 50 when he met my grandmother who was 39 and considered a "spinster" in those days. He loved and adored my grandmother and his children. They had my mother, Aunt Junece and they adopted a cousin’s child- June.  When I was 10 my grandfather was 90 yrs old. Grandmother had passed away from Parkinson’s disease.

             Finding these letters is a wonderful gift to me from my mother. I feel joy that I can read them as an adult and feel her close to me. It gives me an opportunity to know who my grandparents were, what they thought about, what was important to them and how they struggled with the challenges they faced. NEXT TIME: Family As Priority. 

Hello AUGUST!

Good bye to hot July with three digit temps!

Welcome to cooler August with monsoons.

Still summer, still hot, but we're moving towards

FALL...my favorite season of harvest and rest.

Soon we'll all COMPLAIN of the cold,

but for now it's distress with humid heat

that constantly bakes everything dry

as we rush through air conditioned days.

Lamenting the weather is our daily pattern

despite the season...whether it's cold

or hot or infrequently rainy or freezing.

We act like SPOILED little children.

Never realizing that opposition is LIFE.

Part of this needed earthly experience

teaching patience, hope and long suffering

as we push through each day's rush.

Too soon, it's all over as DEATH awaits

each...the final farewell to heat, discomfort,

earthly experiences to be found in each day.

Then, we'll long for those complaining times.