Change
is a constant principle in all our lives, although we fight it. Why can’t
things stay as they are? we sometimes ask.
That’s not the nature of life for anyone. Each day can bring new experiences
and challenges to stimulate our growth as an individual. Although we would prefer
for life to always be a bed of roses, there are bound to be a few thorns work
their way to the surface to disrupt each person’s life. If you have set
expectations and a timeline for your life, you will be disappointed when
surprises arise to change your direction. A perfect agenda increases both your
anticipation and disappointment as the hoped for course of life doesn’t always
happen.
We
start young with children setting up expectations for their future life. What
do you want to be when you grow up? As if the
entire world depends on the young child deciding what he/she thinks others
expect when he/she is an adult. Perhaps we would do better to ask: What
good can you do for the world when you are an adult? or Expect opposition/challenges in life and learn from them. I wish someone had explained to me as a young girl
that fairy tales aren’t real. Few people if any live happily ever
after, instead divorce may rear its ugly
head or death will at some point in your life separate you from loved ones or
you may not marry.
Keeping
a journal of unexpressed feelings about your life can be very enlightening as
you later reread and see the growth that came to you because of how you faced
opposition. Being grounded in a faith or belief in the purpose of life can steady
your course. Sharing what you’ve learned in your journey can help others in
your family or friends along the way. In fact, that’s probably the main value
of family/friends as a sounding board, a source of empathy and courage to
continue meeting each day’s challenges whatever they may be.
Part of aging is learning to deal with physical disabilities or life threatening illnesses, letting go of disappointments and hurts. Forgiving others including yourself can lead to self awareness and adjustments to the continuing opportunities for growth that come to each of us. A private journal can be a safe place to work through negative feelings or talk with a trained counselor or spiritual guide. NEXT TIME: Selfish or Self Actualizing