The phrase
what goes around, comes around is certainly true when it comes to aging issues. I
remember at the funeral of my mom who lived to be 89 years old one of my sons
commenting to his brother…I guess we better think about what to do
with mom. I was the mom he was referring to, only 66 years young then and
definitely not ready for a care center or worse. I laughed at the time.
Although as I’m progressing in my life’s journey, I sometimes wonder what will
happen to me when or if I get to the point where I’ll need assistance. No one
knows when or if that will
happen. Perhaps, I’ll live to be 100 still active and healthy, but it’s an
unknown.
Take
time now to discuss and plan for the future with your family rather than be
caught unprepared. I have sitting by my computer a folder filled with many
important papers: a copy of our will, and a list of important account numbers
for banks, insurance policies, etc. Also some suggestions on a funeral program
and possible obituary, but most importantly is a
living will directing my caregivers on what treatment to give to
prolong my life if needed. I’m not one to want to hang around in a coma or
vegetative state just to help hospitals pay for their fancy equipment. Also, I
do want to be an organ donor. All of this should be discussed with your family
and/or spouse while you still have your wits about you. Where and how do you
want to be buried? My mom had all her funeral plans selected and paid for which
really helped during the stressful time following the unexpected brain tumor
that took her life quickly.
Even
the onset of Alzheimer’s or dementia should be discussed. Financial planning
and/or insurance for assisted care is a good idea also. I remember feeling
relieved when my mom said she didn’t want to be a burden on her family and live
with us if needed. Instead she wanted the independence of living in an assisted
care center. That helped with those decisions. If you do chose to be a
caregiver, it’s so important to honor your loved ones wishes and to take care of your own needs
during this crucial time. Support groups can help and family should share the
burden of caring for needy loved ones. NEXT TIME: Change and Opposition