Probably the most anticipated event in any young woman’s life is that day when she will meet her Prince Charming, fall in love, prepare for her wedding and its activities which can include: finding a date and place for the wedding, buying or making a wedding dress, selecting bridesmaids and their attire, organizing the guest list, designing-printing-mailing the announcements, scheduling a wedding brunch or dinner, catering and decorating for the reception or open house. Most of this work can be planned out by the bride years in advance as she dreams of her special day. All she needs is a willing male. (Photo of my first boyfriend redheaded and freckled Jerry-we meet before kindergarten and planned to marry some day, but I moved away and he changed drastically.)
The groom needs to purchase the wedding rings, propose and hope his intended accepts, endure all the planning, changes and stresses associated with getting married, not forgetting the flowers, the wedding gift, photographer, and honeymoon plans plus a place to live after the marriage. Forgotten are the days of asking the bride’s father for his permission for his daughter’s hand in marriage.
There is a way to simplify all this, just ELOPE. A justice of the peace married my parents secretly one night while they were suppose to be at a dance. After the ceremony that evening, they had a waffle party with friends then everyone returned home as if nothing had happened. The purpose of keeping their wedding a secret was because my dad didn’t have a job at the time. They were both 18, high school graduates and living at home. They kept their elopement a secret for about a month. My mom’s little sister suspected something was up when she discovered a new wedding band hidden under a plate in the china closet. Needless to say, my grandma was not happy when she found out her daughter had eloped but she made the best of it because she liked my dad. An open house celebration for the happy couple was held, then my mom moved in with her in-laws while my dad worked on the railroad. (Photo of my girl friend Marilyn and me on the right playing dressup at age 8-9.)
Some wedding traditions long forgotten are trousseaus and hope chests where the young woman gathered together items to use in her new home and to wear in her new role in society. She needed quilts, linens, pots and pans, dishes, china, silverware, etc. Nowadays young couples just register for these items and hope to get them or exchange wedding gifts for what they need and want.