Monday, August 13, 2012

Affirmations vs. compliments

I have a hard time with books or classes that want you to tell yourself untrue things and then try to believe them like: I'm a success at loosing weight or Everything I touch turns to gold. You get the idea. AFFIRMATIONS-thinking positively but not realistically. All of us are very good at self criticizing so maybe it's time for developing the ability to give positive true compliments to ourselves. An example:

1. BOOKS: Instead of my saying-well, you've certainly failed at trying to sell your own self published books VERSUS complimenting my efforts: I have to say you have really tried to sell your books and YOU HAVE WRITTEN FOUR OF THEM! plus helped other friends to self publish their own. That second slant builds and encourages me rather than tears down.

2. RELATIONSHIPS: Well for all your efforts, the rewards have been few in trying to get your whole family together for a reunion VERSUS  You had a wonderful time with those family members who were able to come and celebrate the new baby's blessing.

3. SELF IMAGE and WEIGHT LOSS: You've gained back most of the weight lost in the past few years and struggle with my eating habits VERSUS You are trying again to loose weight and am exercising more. It feels good.

I suppose you get the idea. We need to be our own best CHEERLEADER. Although it helps to have friends, family or spouse who do that also. The only person we can control is OURSELVES!!! A compliment or two can restore HOPE to our lives...

What are some COMPLIMENTS you need to give yourself? Write them in a comment.

3 comments:

SandyCarlson said...

We do have to be our own best cheerleader because WE SHOW UP! We are human and we need love. It's always great when someone notices!

gremhog susan.hatch@gmail.com said...

Here's the phrase I loved in this entry: -thinking positively but not realistically-

I see that in some, too. It's all good to be a Pollyanna but just saying something is SO, doesn't make it SO. You can't alter reality and believing the lie is just as detrimental as so many other things.

Thanx...good thoughts

Kay said...

I do try, but it's not always easy to do.