While visiting family recently my adult son advised his teenage daughter not to
accept a date from any guy who asks her out by texting. This concerned father
wants to first meet personally face to face any potential dating partner before
okaying his teenager to go out socially. I had to laugh reflecting back on my
lack of dating experiences during high school. I could certainly relate to my
grand daughter’s dilemma of wanting to be invited to the Homecoming dance. Not
dating while in high school was traumatic but seemed normal for me as a shy
tall skinny teenager with no social skills. Nowadays life has changed with cell
phones, and social media on the Internet. The world is almost not recognizable.
Talking is a lost skill in our
modern day of instant texting or e-mailing. Just to sit by someone, look into
their eyes noticing their body language and having a heart to heart talk is a
lost skill. Returning from a weekend visit with my grandchildren, I treasure those
rare moments of conversing that happened when I found myself alone with a loved
one. In the car, sitting side by side having a snack or asking a question about
their activities made for rare occasions to share a conversation together. One
teenage grand daughter is quite curious about my dating days. How did I meet
grandpa, etc. What does love feel like, etc.
As she has reached dating age, I try to impress upon her that I didn’t date
during high school and survived.
I
remember having this same kind of conversation with my mother about her boy
friends and dating when I was in my teens. It was a way to learn life’s
important lessons. Unfortunately my mom never had the facts of life or birds and bees talk with me. She came from a generation that shied
away from such topics. I would have received better instruction from my mom
than my giggling girl friends at overnight slumber parties or from the movies.
There are many lessons that today’s youth need to learn from someone older who
has experienced life and has their welfare at heart. This MUST be done face to
face with love and sensitivity.
What
conversations do you recall having with your parents or grandparents? I
remember writing down the details of my maternal grandmother’s courting days
and marriage. What fun that was. NEXT TIME: Parental Influence.