Thursday, January 15, 2009

Internet Etiquette

Are there any rules for emailing and commenting on blogs? Not that I know of, maybe common courtesy applies. If you receive an email, it's nice-polite if you respond with something-a thanks, yes or no. Doesn't need to be a long response but it shows that you received the email. I try to do that. This week I got a phone call wondering if I was coming to a meeting last Monday. A friend had sent me an email about it, she thought but in reality hadn't. So it's good she called so we both knew what was going on rather than just sending me emails that I never got or answered, then wondering how come I didn't come. I tend to get a little bit bugged when I email people and I hear no response. Then I wonder if they got it. Of course, I realize that not everyone visits their email box daily or almost hourly like I do but...some read their emails and delete them without any answer.

Next topic, those who visit blogs and don't comment. Okay so maybe they have nothing to say or disagree with you and don't want to be rude-that's fine but more likely they don't know HOW to leave a comment. I did a blog about that. I sincerely miss your comments and our interacting-that's WHY I blog, to connect with friends and new acquaintances. So PLEASE COMMENT, do it anonymously if you have to. I see from my Live Traffic Feed that many are visiting my blog and I always wonder what they are thinking so PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT. Thanks. I certainly have lots of opinions today but decided to act on them rather than just react....

19 comments:

Brenda ND said...

Yep, I agree. I love it when people make a comment on my blog. I guess that's why I blog to connect with others.

Teresa Lynne said...

Yes, there are rules to emailing and comments on blogs as far as Etiquette. They even have books on them.

I believe I wrote about this within my blog. I will try and find the link.

Jo, a retired teacher said...

Lin, I'm guilty of visiting without commenting--sometimes even on your blog. Maybe it is better not to know how many are stopping by, then you don't feel bad that they didn't say anything before leaving.

I often don't have anything to say about what I read. Sometimes I disagree with what is said, sometimes I don't know enough about the topic to add anything, sometimes I think the writer is just filling space and my comment would add nothing interesting.

I can just speak for myself, but yes, I'm guilty.

Deborah Godin said...

Well, I'll be honest here, and say that I really dislike those Live Feed gadgets, pretty much for the reasons you outlined. They just a little too 1984 for me, I feel like my movements are being tracked! (that's a little tongue in cheek, but a little true as well). And I think it's too easy for a blog owner to misinterpret or overinterpret a meaning behind seeing that someone has visited and not commented. I sometimes visit a blog and don't have anything to say. Not because I didn't like the post, but we don't all have a response to everything everytime. I also don't feel it's personal enough just to leave a generic "nice post" comment with no elaboration. Or, maybe I do want to comment, and maybe have a lot to say and don't have time to organize my thoughts at the moment, or the phone rings, so I click out of the computer, and meaning to come back later, but of course, don't always make it. Or, I like the post and want to come back to email it to a friend but don't leave a comment. Or, I click on it by accicdent when I want the one above or below in my bookmark list. So many reasons why my little flag and city pop up on a Live Feed but not a comment. And yet, when I know the people have a live feed have them for a reason, and I think, Gee are they going to wonder why I didn't comment...and take it negatively. I try not to feel obligated to leave a comment just because the blog owner has a Live Feed. I even have a "Blogging Without Obligation" badge on my blog margin, which is kind of a live-and-let-live policy towards the "musts" and "shoulds" of blogging, but it isn't always easy to do! Well, that's my thoughts on blogging; hope it adds something to the discussion. You've raised some good points!

Brenda Leyland said...

Lin, Like you, I love to have people leave a comment when they visit me.

When I first started my blog, I had people who came to visit who were as new as I was to blogging, so when I figured out how to leave comments, I posted a little 'how to' to help them also know what to do. It helped.

I don't always leave a comment every time I visit someone. If it's my first time visit, I tend to leave a comment to indicate someone new has been to see them. When I go back again, I may or may not always comment, just depends if I have the time or if I connect in some way to what I found that day.

I know how much I enjoy receiving comments, so I do leave my 'footprint' as often as I can.

Brenda Leyland said...

PS. I find leaving comments and receiving them back matters to me. To me it makes the connection of the heart complete. It's not so much fun if no one responds to your 'soul' poured out in a posting.

Brenda Leyland said...

PSS... And since I've been dealing with inner heart issues and finding resolution/healing to many past things in my life, I've finally stopped feeling any sense of 'rejection'. That used to be an issue for me.... so this blogging stuff shows me I'm growing! YAH!

I love it when people respond, but I'm totally okay if they choose not to.

alicia said...

I read your blog everyday :)

mom/caryn said...

And there it is folks! A perfect example of how to adhere to fresh resolutions for the New Year.

Lin, this is perfect! Not only are you right on target with most of the opinions expressed... no surprises there... but, importantly, it's in direct keeping with promises you made to yourself. Good going!

I agree that e-mails should be acknowledged, It's almost like ignoring someone when they're talking to you when you don't respond... however, that being said, I don't always respond quickly as I generally only check my e-mail once or twice a week.

Now... as for why there have been times when I may not have left a comment. I don't like contention... there have been times when I really disagreed with what was said and don't want to leave any feelings of contention with words that I may feel boiling up within me. I feel pretty safe with you and have taken an opposing point of view on occasion. I know you know that I respect your thoughts... always. But, I'ts not that easy with everyone. I also don't know anything about some of the topics that are being discussed. I find it interesting to learn, but, I don't have anything to contribute.
There have been a couple of times when I've just been left speechless or overcome with an emotion and I want to cerebrate on it or savor the moment. And sometimes I just don't want the leave the 117th comment that I wonder about ever being read anyway. It doesn't happen a lot, but it happens. Usually, I find that it's a fun way to carry on a conversation with a new friend. I really, really enjoy almost everything that I read and want to open up a line of communication with the voice on the other end of the moniter. I almost always try to say something. I know it's such a thrill for me to hear from others. But, now and then I just don't comment. I know I was almost shocked to find out that my sisters-in-law read my blogs. They never comment. My son never comments either. It used to make me think they didn't like what I had to say... if they thought I was bloviating. I just came to grips with it.

I don't like the live feed thing myself... I don't the like feeling of being tracked. It's fun for the blog owner to know where their readers are coming from, I'm sure... so I kicked my bad attitude out to the street and It's not important enough for me to be bother by. I often go back and visit sights to see what other comments have been left. I visit yours a dozen times a day because it's an access to some others that I can't figure out how to add to my own site.

Anyway... "thems my feelins on the subject".

Jean said...

I agree about at least acknowledging that an e-mail was received. That's not to say I haven't neglected to acknowledge an e-mail now and then, but I do try to let the sender know I got his/her message. I agree, too, that it's nice to receive comments on blogs.

SandyCarlson said...

Lin,
You make some good points. I think following up on email with the phone is important. Some hyperactive spam filters can really mess up a calendar!

I love visitors, too. I have taught my parents how to comment on my daughter's blog, and they love giving her the encouragement. Just a little bit of kindness goes a long way!

Linda Reeder said...

I have a Feedjit map but I usually forget to look at it. When I do I'm always amazed at how many visitors I've had. I have no idea who most of them are.
When I first started blogging I was so thrilled to get a few readers who became regulars. I found out later that I have amny family members who read my blog all of the time, including my two childran, sisters-in-law, cousins, but none of them ever comment. I've just gotten used to it. But I do have to remind myself not to spill any family secrets. They are watching!
That's why I am so grateful for the regular family of blog friends I have acquired. I try to visit them often and usually leave a comment, but not always, for many of the reasons already stated by others. I like comments and I know that others do to. If you want to sustain any relationship you have to participate.
For those who just want to check in, skim of read, I hope I've made it worth their while, but I'll never know, and I don't need to.
As for email, however, I do expect a response, and sooner rather than later.

dellgirl said...

You are so right, Lin. Common courtesy and common sense. But, you know what? Going back to email...I answered all at first... sometimes just a 'thanks I appreciate it' or an 'I got it'or the likes. They just kept coming, fwd fwd fwd one thousand fifty-nine names attached, not a single solitary word along personal lines.

Then I became less and less interested thinking...they could say, 'hey fool, thought about you when I read this'. I soon stopped forwarding, started deleting, and stopped saying "thanks (for nothing).

Blogging has some of the same 'crazy-makers'...the ones with eighteen billion friends and the friends never see or hear from them. What's that. I believe that's the twitter and facebook work. I understand it there, but not on blogs.

Who knows, I could be wrong. I guess they have their reasons.

Oooops!!! I almost got carried away.

dellgirl said...

I intended to say, "i believe that is how twitter and facebook work (with thousands of friends and followers). I understand it in those settings, not on blogs though.

ramblingwoods.com said...

Just google it and there are suggested rules posted online..I too love comments...

Kay said...

I have a few people who come to my blog but haven't figured out how to leave a comment even though I've explained how to them. I wish everybody would leave a comment but to be honest I don't always, always because sometimes I just can't think of anything new to say. I agree that e-mails should definitely be answered. Definitely!

Carla said...

I don't always comment. Sometimes it's because I don't have anything to add or I'm not interested in the topic. And sometimes it's because I really disagree with what the blogger has said...but would prefer not to tell them. I also rarely comment on posts that talk about religion. I believe in God, but don't like organized religion at all. So I just don't say anything. And then there's the annoying problem with my dial-up connection. Sometimes I find it difficult to get to the comment form...so I get frustrated and give up. As I've said before, I appreciate it when people comment on my blog, but it's okay with me if they don't. Many people lead very busy lives and it's all they can do to just visit a few blogs.

Anyway, my long-winded point is that I think people often have good reasons for not leaving comments every time they visit.

Gittan said...

It is very interesting to read your thoughts on your blog! Specially enjoyed what you wrote about cousins. In Sweden we only call our parent's sibling's children cousins, and know almost nothing about 2nd and 3rd cousins. You have reunions, not very many gather their relatives here. Glad you keep track of your relatives, Lin! But we do have a national registration that makes it possible to find them, if we want to.

Sandy's Notes said...

So, here I am looking in your archives just reviewing what you've written. You left a comment for me that received an award and now I can't find the booger.

This is a good post though, it's something like you would hear from Micky Rooney, is that his name? Anyway, you do good stuff Lin!